Love Me Always (The Fielding Brothers' Saga) Read online

  “Pleased to meet you, once again,” Ian said.

  Nicholas took a step forward and cleared his throat. “We have no time to waste. Are you packed, Miss Martin? If so, our servants will get your trunks loaded.”

  Giving him a forced smile, she squeezed her hands into fists. “Yes. I shall instruct my maid to inform your servants.” She turned and gracefully walked out of the room.

  Once inside the hallway and out of view, she stopped and flattened her back against the wall. Placing her hand over her heaving chest, she sighed. She’d definitely have to watch herself around that particular brother before she ended up revealing how she really felt.

  From the other room, her father spoke. “Nicholas, pardon me for being candid, but why are you so hostile toward my daughter? She’s the future Duchess of Ashton and I would ask that you treat her with the respect befitting her station.”

  “Yes, I comprehend her place in my uncle’s household.” Nicholas’ voice escalated. “Please accept my apologies for being so forthright, but I’m on a tight schedule and we need to depart soon. Now, if you will excuse me, I shall wait outside.”

  Heavy footsteps reverberated toward the front door, followed by slamming of the hard oak. Catherine closed her eyes and groaned. Her father shouldn’t have added coal to the already stoked fire.

  After informing her maid she wished to leave, Catherine hurried to her bedroom and made certain she’d not overlooked anything of importance during the packing. The emptiness of the room brought a hollow ache to her chest, but she refused to cry. This was the end of her youth, and there was nothing she could do about it.

  Not long ago, she’d lost control in front of her father, but she’d vowed never to do so again. She may not like the life her parents chose for her, but she’d make the best of an unwanted situation. If she had to live a life with a man she didn’t love, at least she could make friends with his nephews and have them as companions. Even though her future looked bleak, perhaps all was not lost.

  Closing the door on her past, she proceeded down the back staircase. It would be time to leave soon, and she didn’t want that man any angrier. She didn’t know if she’d be able to hold her tongue around him. Her companion, Mrs. Berkley, would certainly scold Catherine for not acting like a lady.

  When she stepped outside, the warm summer breeze blew against her hot cheeks, and she lifted her face to the wind. Breathing deeply, she took in the fresh air, memorizing for the last time the scents of her country home – fresh hay, spring flowers, and homemade soap. She’d miss this place and her childhood friends. She’d turn her future into a quest, and an adventure it would be with the very irritated Nicholas Fielding to contend with.

  As she neared the wagons and coaches, she saw two of Fielding’s servants were already loading her trucks. They were immaculately grand, but it was the vehicle in the lead that drew her attention. Pulled by six identical white horses with gray harnesses, the body of the coach glazed in shiny black with the duke’s coat of arms painted on the door panel. The footmen assisting with the loading were impeccably dressed. Each wore black breeches with blue-striped waistcoats and matching topcoats decorated with gold buttons. With their shiny black boots, white shirts and gloves, she would feel like royalty traveling with them.

  They looked up and smiled at her, and she politely returned the greeting. Slowly, she walked around the main coach, and came face-to-face with the one man she wanted to avoid. In silence, she groaned. As before, Nicholas’ green eyes were dark with malice. His drawn face and tight lips caused her to shudder. Although his overpowering presence made her heart flounder and her legs shake, she held herself firm.

  He arched one of his eyebrows. “Are you so eager to wed you are willing to leave without saying farewell to your father?”

  “We have already said our good-byes, if you must know.”

  “Indeed, you are correct. I heard.”

  She widened her eyes as heat rushed to her cheeks. “You did?”

  “I could not hear the words exactly as much as your tone. You have a strong voice for such a petite woman. You are nothing like the child I remembered from our youth.”

  Instead of defending herself, as was her first reaction, she stubbornly lifted her chin, challenging him with her gaze. “And you are certainly not what I remember either.”

  A grin touched his lips for a mere second before the scowl quickly replaced it. He crossed his arms. “What’s this? No tears?” He chuckled, although it sounded forced. “Are you that eager to leave a loving and secure home to enter an unfamiliar one?”

  She stiffened her spine. “Yes. I’m ready to start my new life.”

  His gaze swept over her again and an inner shiver ran through her. He turned his head and peered across the meager land she called home, over the two-story whitewashed cottage on farmland where she’d lived all her life. Before her death, her mother had kept the place looking lovely with fresh flowers, adding a little color to the scenery. Trees and bushes were trimmed and quite green for this time of year. Obviously by the Nicholas’ upturned nose, he didn’t think much of her home.

  “I can see why you would be eager.” His attention turned back to her. “And I’ll wager you cannot wait to start spending more of my uncle’s money.”

  Her palms itched to slap the all-too-arrogant attitude right off his face, but she refrained. She balled her hands in the folds of her dress. “You can believe whatever you wish.” She stepped toward the coach. “I also believe we are not going to get along well, so I think our trip will be more pleasant if we avoided each other.”

  She raised her skirts to step inside the vehicle, and he grasped her elbow to help her. Once inside, she yanked her arm out of his clutches. “And I do not need your assistance.”

  The corner of his mouth lifted in an annoying grin, and she clutched her gown to keep from reverting back to her tomboy ways and punching him in the nose. In fact...a childhood memory sneaked through the recesses of her mind, recalling when she had socked him in the face once before.

  “As you wish Duchess,” he sarcastically replied. Lines of anger creased his forehead before he swung around and stalked away.

  She took a deep breath and tried to slow her pounding heart. Her eyes stung from unshed tears, but she quickly blinked them away. Hearing voices from the house, she straightened. She didn’t want anyone to know how upset Nicholas had made her. Emily and Mrs. Berkley, her companion, ascended the coach and took the seat in front of her.

  “Oh, this is so very exciting.” Emily bubbled with enthusiasm.

  Catherine’s companion huffed and lifted her large nose, her attention moving to the window. The older woman twined her pudgy fingers together in her lap and pulled her lips into a straight line.

  Catherine’s father stuck his head inside. “Well, daughter, are you ready to depart?”

  She nodded.

  “Splendid. I know you are upset with me, but I have arranged this for your future happiness. Grant is a caring man, you shall see.”

  She gave her father another nod, her heart wrenching, making it hard to breathe.

  “I do love you very much whether you want to believe it or not.” Henry reached out and squeezed her hands resting in her lap.

  For a moment she thought she saw a flicker of regret flash in his eyes, and for that second, she wanted to fling herself into his arms and beg him to forgive her and show her unconditional love whether he thought her insane or not. Then a blank look crossed his face and he backed out of the coach. She’d been correct to assume he didn’t love her enough to keep her with him. So be it.

  Gregg poked his head inside, a charming sparkle lighting his eyes. His smile made her relax.

  “We shall start off now,” he said. “Do you need anything before we leave, Miss Martin?”

  She shook her head. “Considering what our relationship will soon be, I think it will be appropriate to call me Catherine.”

  “I would like that.” He winked. “I would definitely
like to be your friend, and please call me Gregg.”

  “That would please me, as well.”

  “Splendid. Then shall we depart? If you need anything, just tap on the roof and the driver will stop.”

  “Thank you.”

  His grin widened as he pulled away from the door and closed it. A few minutes later, the coach lurched forward and the small caravan was on its way.

  She stared out the window. Hodgson stood by a tree wiping tears from his eyes. He lifted in farewell, and she returned a wave. She watched until him and the house disappeared. Emotion clogged her throat and stung her eyes. Refusing to cry again, she breathed deeply and clamped her teeth together. Her new life began...and she must make the best of it.

  “I do like Gregg,” Emily remarked after about ten minutes of silence. “Both he and his younger brother seem very pleasant.”

  Snapping out of her thoughts, Catherine focused on the conversation. Memories assailed her and she smiled. “Yes. I noticed as well how charming they are. Besides their height and physique, they really have not changed much. When I was nine years of age, their uncle would bring them with him during his visits with my parents. They came once a month.” Catherine quickly lost her smile. “Many things have changed since then. I’m not the tomboy I used to be.”

  Mrs. Berkley turned toward her. “And you’d do best not to remember that part of your life. It’s a good thing His Grace sent you to school to reform your ways. You are not to ever look back. From this day forward you’ll act the proper young lady in every way.”

  Catherine released an irritated sigh and relaxed against the seat. “Yes, Mrs. Berkley. I shall become the proper young lady the girls’ school taught me to be.” Hopefully, Gregg and Ian would be her friends and help her to adjust.

  But not Nicholas. Definitely not that man.

  Chapter Two

  Nicholas kicked his heels into the horse’s belly and urged the animal forward, eager for this trip to be over. Despite the perfect weather, he was tired of this journey and his patience had been worn to a frazzle. Since their departure from the Martin’s cottage, he’d ignored his brothers and was content to exist in his own world – a world where he must learn to deal with the pain of his breaking heart.

  Keeping a straight back, he led the group of travelers toward his uncle’s home. If anyone could see what images ran through Nick’s mind, they’d believe the worst of him. May the devil take him for his thoughts, for Satan must surely be meddling in his life since fate was so unkind.

  The very girl he’d secretly loved as a lad would soon marry his uncle!

  Five years ago he’d realized his feelings for Catherine but knew neither of them were old enough to act upon them. Time would develop both him and Catherine into mature adults, which was what he waited for. As children, he’d enjoyed being around her. She made him laugh and he took pleasure in the way his heart leapt whenever they were together.

  He’d waited all these years to proclaim his feelings...only to have his uncle – whom Nick adored – yank them from him. He shifted in his saddle, his gut clenching as a numbing chill covered his body. How could he allow his uncle to marry the woman Nick once loved? The woman he still loved. Then again, how could he stop the older man’s happiness...especially when his days were numbered? Nick couldn’t bring himself to tell Colonel Martin that Grant Fielding wasn’t just under the weather – he was dying.

  Nick glanced over his shoulder at the coach and shook his head. What possible reason could his uncle have for wanting a young wife anyway? Uncle Grant must have known what Nick did five years ago. It was obvious back then Catherine would turn into a real beauty.

  As a young girl, she’d been quite lovely but the years had only enhanced her looks. He’d literally lost his breath when she glided down the stairs, looking as regal as any woman he’d met.

  Although her stubbornness really didn’t surprise him, the outburst of her temper was something unexpected. When she’d raised her voice against her father, her displeasure nearly shook the walls of the cottage. But why? She was getting what all girls her age wanted...a wealthy, titled husband.

  Sighing heavily, Nick rearranged the reins in his hands. His uncle was going ahead with this ludicrous arrangement even though he was extremely sick. Each day Uncle Grant grew more ill, withering away before Nick’s eyes. And speaking of eyes…the duke’s eyesight had diminished as well. Nick had to practically stand right in front of him to be seen.

  “Hold up, Nick,” Gregg called his name from behind. “What’s your hurry?”

  Nick slowed his horse until his brothers caught up. “My mind wandered,” he explained. “I didn’t realize I had ridden so far ahead.”

  “It’s around the lunch hour,” Ian said. “What do you say we find a nice little inn and feed our bellies? I didn’t get to eat breakfast this morning because you were in such a hurry to get to the Martin’s.”

  “Catherine is probably hungry, as well,” Gregg added. “And you know how women are when they get that way.”

  Nick gripped the reins tighter. Would he ever be able to hear her name without dying inside? And why couldn’t he get rid of the hostility forming a knot in his chest?

  “Yes. I know how women can be. I’ll ride on ahead and locate an eating establishment.”

  With renewed anger, Nick urged his horse into a fast trot.

  An hour later, Nick brought the group of travelers to an inn five miles south, just out of their way. It wasn’t exactly the kind of eating establishment he’d hoped for, but being this far out in the country, it was the best he could find. He’d previously paid the owner more than the working man made in a month to have a clean table ready, and warm, fresh food awaiting their arrival.

  As he dismounted, his two brothers rushed to the main carriage to assist Catherine. Nick shook his head. Those two fawned over her as if she were royalty. Did they think their act of heroism would put them in their uncle’s good grace? Perhaps they found Catherine charming and attractive.

  But of course. How could they not? She had a certain graceful beauty that tore Nick apart with longing every time he looked at her. Excitement twinkled in her amazingly blue eyes as she focused on his brothers. Of course, she probably loved the way Gregg and Ian adored her, hanging on her every word.

  As the threesome walked his way, Nick grunted with disdain. Her eyes now sparkled as blue as an ocean on a clear day, instead of the turbulent color they’d been earlier this morning when Nick had exchanged heated words with her in front of the carriage.

  Gregg said something and she laughed. Nick mentally dismissed the pleasant music drifting to his ears. She was definitely trained the right way. There was no way his uncle wouldn’t be sucked in by her charm just like Grant’s doltish nephews were right now.

  As they entered and shown to their table, Nick slid on the bench across from his brothers and Catherine who sat between them. With narrowed eyes, he studied her as she merrily conversed with Gregg and Ian. Every once in a while she’d glance at him, before turning her attention back upon his calf-eyed brothers.

  The food was served and the conversation mellowed. Although Nick could tell she remembered the manners taught to her in school, it was obvious his brothers forgot their upbringing. They talked with their mouths full and rested their elbows on the table.

  Nick didn’t enter the conversation and finished eating before the others had. He scooted back in his seat and folded his arms, continuing to listen to the immature conversation Gregg and Ian kept rattling on about. Why am I being punished this way? Nick wondered.

  Before too long, something warm brushed against his elbow, and he looked up at the serving maid. He’d failed to notice her earlier, but now she looked at him with a familiar spark of interest in her eyes.

  “Is there anythin’ else I can git ya, gov’na?”

  Nick gave her one of his devastating smiles – the kind he’d been told would send a maid’s heart fluttering out of control. Although he thought her speech need
ed improvement, she was passively pretty. Her dark blonde hair hung over her shoulders, looking as if it needed to be washed. The baggy cream-colored blouse rode low on one shoulder and the dirty, tattered skirt was not attractive at all, in his opinion.

  “I’d like more wine,” he said nicely and winked.

  “Sure thing.” She hurried away and within minutes brought him another drink.

  He leaned closer to her and grinned, but then someone kicked his shin from underneath the table. Pain shot up his leg. The disapproving glares of his brothers made him pause. The bright red face of the woman sitting between them also reminded him who was in his company at the table. The loud huff from Mrs. Berkley sitting at the end of the bench also let him know he’d be getting an ear boxing from her soon.

  “Are you forgetting our guest?” Gregg’s voice came out low and firm.

  Nick shrugged. “Not at all.”

  “Then would you mind doing that with the serving girl in another time and place?”

  The serving maid walked away, watching Nick over her shoulder. He withdrew his attention from her and glared at Gregg.

  “What troubles you?” Nick snapped. “Has our uncle’s soon-to-be bride not been to an inn before? Am I hurting her tender sensibilities?”

  Catherine’s gaze didn’t leave her food, but her face flamed brighter. She stirred her crust of bread around the plate. A small pang of regret began in his chest. He shouldn’t have said it, but now it was too late. Curse his damaged heart.

  “Nicholas,” Gregg warned, “this is not the time.”

  Mrs. Berkley cleared her throat. “I believe this is not a proper subject, either.”

  Nick shifted his gaze from Gregg to Ian, who still gave condescending looks, then to the embarrassed girl who didn’t meet his eyes.

  “As you wish,” he snapped, pushing himself from the table. “If we are finished with our meals, I’m ready to leave.” He stormed out of the inn, his heart crushing with each step.

  * * * *

  Catherine ran a shaky hand over her heated cheeks as she stared out the window of the carriage, waiting for Mrs. Berkley to join her. The older woman had pulled Nicholas aside after they’d walked out of the inn. Catherine wished she could have heard what her companion said.